Case #5 | Reason to Stop Writing


Heh.
I was going through my blog list, visiting all 106 blogs which I have been following since the past 8 years. Reading, leaving comments at some and removing those who have been inactive for years. At the end of the process, I was left with 68 blogs. The other 38 have been inactive; some do leave their last words, others choose to dissipate into thin air. I hope they are doing fine regardless. 

I sincerely hope they are doing good.

I write a lot. I write mainly in Bahasa Melayu as my English is basically horrendous for people to read. I write in a blog where you can see me updating them almost every single day. I write short stories (because I am super bad at series-writing) which I occasionally posted at my Wattpad's account. I write in my diary. I write long reflection post whenever I am updating my private social media accounts. You see the point, I am so accustomed to writing as a medium to express my string of thoughts.

It was two years ago. 

If I decided to stop writing one day, I wonder what would be the reason?

Nowadays, you can rarely see me writing. I have abandoned my Wattpad's account ever since 2018. I think the last time I updated was in January 2018, not until recently (yes, I actually post something last week). I do have a separate bujo which I use as a diary other than my daily bujo. But I only write when I have things that are too private to share with any soul. Good news, I only write three times in that last year! You can see me writing my inner thought on Twitter but then within a minute, it has been deleted. I have grown choosy as I share things in my social media. I do not want to incur unpleasant feedbacks, explicitly or implicitly. The last thing I ever want is to cause unnecessary distress. I have experienced that, and I hate it a lot.

I wonder how about the others?
I wonder what makes people turn their back from things they used to find solace into? 
I wonder if by using the phrase 'turn their back' would ultimately make me guilty of accusing their action as a betrayal - unconsciously. Language analysis into practice lol.

Even as I write this, I am clueless with my writing. I have no idea how it would turn out. Would I come to a situation where I am going to abandon them at the end?

No idea.

One thing I can promise is that if I stopped writing - it is not because I have fallen out of love from it.

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27 comments

  1. Hi fatin, I recently stumble upon your blog. Nice to meet you, I'm Lala!
    Reading your story really resonate with me. When I started writing in my blog in 2018, I wasn't consistent enough and I totally abandon them for a year. And last year, I tried to get back to it slowly. But I wasn't consistent too. I wonder and question a lot about how writing will help with my mental health.
    Last year was rough. But after feeling down and get back up, I found myself enjoy writing again. At first, I thought writing wasn't for me, but I remember feeling so refresh after putting it up on my blog, and the long break that I had was indeed the best one I did.

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    1. I read somewhere in the blogging world - we should not force our self to write :) Write when you want to write, write even if you ended up with two lines. When I went missing from posting anything here, I used to write in my notepad, just to clear up my mind.

      You did well, Lala! As your name suggest, I hope you would be enjoying the coming days similar to music jazzing through!

      Delete
    2. Sometime when I force myself to write, it felt like I lost my real intentions with writing.
      But another reason for me to stop writing was dealing with fears. I write and write but never publish in my blog. I scared that someone I know will read them and make assumptions. So I stopped. But as I gorw older, this thing never bother me anymore apart from fighting against myself. Dealing with laziness and procrastination hahaha
      Thanks for your lovely comment, I will jazz my way through life! (ノ´ヮ´)ノ*:・゚✧

      Delete
  2. Please, don't ever stop writing.. I still want to read your blog. Huhuhuu.

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    1. At this moment, I won't. Thank you for the words! It means a lot!

      Delete
  3. writing can be so much for me... even though stuff on my blog were mainly reviews, i find comfort while doing so. had few of crappy poems hidden away in the pages of my journal, something that i wanted to share but never had the courage to.

    even if you do stop writing, you would eventually found your way back to it, whatever it is, im hoping the best for you

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    1. At the end of the day, we find comfort within our own sanctuary :) I enjoy reading poem, but writing one ... hands down, I am the worst! Someday someday, you will have the courage to do so!

      Thank you :)

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  4. Just found your blog. Your writing is really good! Keep it up. Followed and will always want to continue reading your writings.

    https://thejagungspirasi.blogspot.com/

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  5. I got what you meant. Sometimes we loss our precious treasure passion for some unknown reason. But believe me, it will be always there. Either it is on private or you make it publicly. Blogging is a thing that we choose to vent out somethings at first and it is okay. But hey faten, I read your blog :)

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    1. Your words make me realize, it is - it will always be there regardless.

      Thank you for spending your time here! It means a lot!

      Delete
  6. Hey banana!I just stop by here.Your blog was so lovely. You know what? Sometime there's a feeling inside our mind where we want to stop to do all the things we love.I don't know why,but i believe it may happen to us one day.

    I love writing,but sometime i do very lazy about it.Haha...i wish i got the spirits to keep on writing.
    Keep on writing and inspire people!

    Adios amigo!

    https://nasuha-itsmyessay.blogspot.com/

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    1. I guess, at some point a break is a given condition no matter how much we used to love that something :) But a break does not necessarily always means it is bad, isn't? :D

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  7. As for me, I will never stop writing. During the early 2010s I used to express my writing through blogging A LOT. Then I became inactive because I was more focused on fanfics. Brainstorming every now and then and outlining plots. At times I would express myself by writing in notebooks.

    Tbh, people never actually stop writing. I think they just find another medium for self expression. That is why some blogs are abandoned. It is sad actually. It makes me wonder what happen to these people. I am also guilty for abandoning my blog though sometimes. It's just that. I see blogging as a hobby and I don't want to make it as a social obligation or something. So if I'm inactive means I actually found other means of expression. I will get back to blogging though eventually cumanya tak religiously update post.

    Bottomline, I don't think there is any reason for me to stop writing. Just kurang menulis tapi masih menulis hehehehehe

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    1. I used to have this idea that 'abandoning' your blog = betrayal; unconsciously, I was treating writing as a obligation, something that I hate doing. It was in the past.

      I enjoy your writing a lot, even before you go to hiatus :)

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  8. I thought I'd stop but end up starting anew. And I was glad I did. My love for writing leads me to a new blog.
    I wonder what would've happened if I really stop writing for good.

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    1. Me too! But one thing I am sure enough, there would be people who would secretly pray that you will keep on writing :)

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  9. I do have same thought too since last year, jarang post sangat dekat blog. Ada one time tu, sendiri wonder kenapa dah jarang menulis. Is the passion starts to fade away? Did I found other medium to express myself? Banyaklah soalan yang bermain dalam kepala otak. Anyway, I like to read your blog :)

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    1. Kaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan, that 'kenapa dah jarang menulis?' got me the same sobs. But, anyhow as long as kita happy - it's okay :)

      Hehehehe, thankssss a lot!

      Delete
  10. Hi Faten :) I understand this.
    I used to treat my blog like an FB / Twitter acc - posting small updates, recent thoughts or just random feelings. Then some people said it wasn't that interesting and hence I kinda stop altogether.
    I stopped writing on my blog for a whole year! Now I am regaining the passion back and starting to rediscover the solace I found in writing blogs and the interactions I have with fellow bloggers are fun too.

    I hope you will feel more refreshed and re-ignite your writing momentum.

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    1. Let's not make people dictate how we should write and express our self! You did well regardless, I am looking forward for your entries!

      Delete
  11. I've always on and off from writing since I first fell in love with it but I think there's no definite answer as to when or why to stop writing. I think everyone loves writing in their own be it blogger or not, everyone does and we'll never stop writing. Just as you said, we write in our diary if it's something we couldn't tell a single soul.
    But as bloggers, I hope even if we're to abandon the blog, we'll always get to it again, to fell in love with it again.

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    1. Yessssss, that is exactly what I intend to deliver :)

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  12. visiting for the second time with a different e-mail account !


    https://itsthesuraya.blogspot.com/2020/02/notice-changing-blogger-e-mail.html

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  13. benda yang sama yang jadi kat aku :/

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