Assalammualaikum <3

First of all, congratulations to Garaeki (@ Leo) for reaching 520 followers (544, as I am writing this)! Celebrating with books some more uWu! Having followers, even one or two, feel like having one load of comrades that would accompany us #NotAlone.  I can't wait to have my own giveaway where I can give book for free too XD 

I do wonder if I would ever hit 500 tsk.

I have several books in my wish list at the moment lol (no surprise). Currently, I am trying to read more English novels written by Asian writers, specifically, ones from South-East Asian (SEA) region. I have been eyeing books by authors such as Hanna Alkaf, Kevin Kwan and Julya Oui. All of them recently release new works. But, one I have always wanted to read is Crazy Rich Asian series by Kevin Kwan. 

I went to watch the movie last year when it first comes out. Man, you can literally see my jaw dropping for every second of the movie :') If the movie can be that beautiful, I wonder how bewitching the novel itself - where we can use our own imagination to paint the image in our mind.

Special mention to Suraya from Surayooo for tagging me :)

Best of luck! :D

They say, our 20s are pretty confusing age. At one point, we feel like we had it figured - not all, but probably a quarter of it. Yet, things take sudden change, the things we had in mind soon crumbled into specks of dust and we no longer know what we want to do. That little thing we hold dearly in our hand, clasped firmly in between our trembling fingers as we tried to move higher to the mountain. Yet we stumbled into a deep forest. Deep forest that does not only attack us with the mist of insecurity but strangely taken away whatever left in our hands too.

I want to live. 

At one point, I think I know what I wanted to do with my degree. I think I finally figured what I wanted to do with my life. What road I am going to take in order to achieve that dream. But, I failed to recognize our road to success does not always appear in straight line. There are branches of road. There are going to take us into the forest, the sea, the city, the people. We stumbled. We might stop - only to take a breath hopefully. Something like the Tomakninah in prayers. But we are not going to stop for eternity, unless the Higher Power decided to take away our soul.

Up until last week, I think I know where I want to go. Crossing the goals I have made in early 2020. The archived one though - like doing internship, which I chose not to right before ending the sem prior to short semester (period for internship) for a peace of my mind end up become a triggering matter for me. Not that much till it literally trigger me, but it bugged me to some extend. I wish I do my internship, yet the leisure I am having to do something I like - attending webinars, watching dramas, studying on my own, reading a lot - stopped me from sighing for a decision I have made (which is, really, not that bad either).

Assalammualaikum.

Well, it's been a while? Lol. 

A number of things have changed since the day I started my ertl (Emergency Remote Teaching & Learning) experience. I thought I can handle it - apparently, I have to admit defeat at certain days...or subject(s) even. Every single day is just a battle. Really, as much as I love doing online classes as it would allow people to be more open and brave in voicing out their opinions - the dimmer part of online learning cannot just be tossed aside.

Moving forward, it has been a week since my final assessment. I finished my exam on Monday and submitted my individual essay on Friday. It has been a week of lazing around, doing nothing other than watching drama on Viu and fangirling on Youtube :) I finished a crime-thriller drama, The Bridge Season 2, which is so good (and twisted) I admit! I have ditched Malay drama for so long, forgetting that some of them could provide such a rewarding experience.

I still read Malay novels, and I am not ashamed to admit this. I share similar sentiments with a few of my course-mate who reads Malay novel despite the tendency for people to insult Malay novel (without actually reading them). We just need to find the right book for us as reading is a continuous journey. 

I am still recovering from fever and flu - but life has been better. There is so much thing happening around the world at the moment. We probably feel a sense of urgency to know everything. The latest news about COViD-19, the Beirut explosion, UAE being the third Muslims country to have diplomatic ties with Israel, the current (chaotic) political scene in Malaysia or even the heated discussion about Muslims repressive so-called 'representation' on Netflix. (lol all these from Twitter)

But you know - it is okay to not know every single thing that is happening. It is good to know more about the world, yet - if it would create chaos inside us - it is better to just focus on ourself. Do things that would help ourself, the time would come where it would become beneficial to society. The time would come when we suddenly feel like reading about them, we know ourself better isn't? Loud and clear.

I intend to write more. You can expect a weekly update ehe because I miss writing so much! Besides, I have put aside a bunch of books I want to finish this semester break. I do not know if I can finish them, but I can try. At least. Tsk. I wanna learn how to do brush lettering too, that would require a lot of practises ehe.

Other than that, I hope all of you are doing good. 

See you in the next entry :)

Quartet oleh Saidatul Saffaa sebenarnya novel yang membuatkan aku menimbang sama ada should I or should I not read it sebab dari sinopsis yang aku baca – pendek kata, ada yang aku tak berkenan dari sekilas perenggan sinopsis itu. 

Tapi bila dah berkali-kali novel ni naik depan mata aku, I decide then – why not? Jadi aku baca sampai first part, which I found quite interesting frankly sebab aku rasa dia ada kaitan jugak dengan perspektif biasa kita sebagai perempuan. Lol. 

Atau aku…heh.

Lepastu aku gatal tangan baca last chapter and I was like…shoot! I hate this! Aku taksuka stail cerita end macam ni. Jadi aku stop dan letak novel ni ke tepi. Sebab aku takboleh brain kenapa? But I end up, picking it back after a day or two, and continue reading it sampai ke halaman terakhir sebab aku curious.

.

.

.

It is beautiful, somehow?

Kalau baca review dekat Goodreads pun sebenarnya banyak review yang bercampur, antara yang suka sangat dan tak suka. Lagipun, aku rasa ramai yang kecewa sebab letakkan penulis sama stail-nya dengan salah seorang penulis dari penerbitan yang sama just because she wrote about islamic-hijrah too. Aku rasa sangat harsh untuk cakap cerita ini hanya berkisar tentang Misa, watak utama, yang sibuk untuk mencari peneman hidup. Novel ni macam coming-of-age pun ada, progress buku dari halaman pertama hingga ke hujung buat pembaca sama-sama ‘membesar’ dengan Misa.

Sama-sama berbunga hati dengan Misa.

Sama-sama struggle dengan struggle Misa.

Sama-sama terkesan dengan apa yang Misa lalu.

Sama-sama jugak kita tengok dia bangun bila the same thing keep toppling her. People would think she is stupid for doing so, tapi kan – aren’t we all like that? Ada satu masa aku rasa karakter Misa tu sebenarnya macam satu sarcasm yang kita taknak terima sebab macam tak logik je tindakan dia tu.

Tapi, entahlah – it screams. Loud but I heard it in mumble because aku dengar dengan takpakai spect mata.

Lol.

Ada sesuatu dalam novel ni yang buat it lingers in mind. Aku taktau... sebenarnya, aku taknak describe. Selain itu, among things yang aku boleh pick up dari novel ni:

1. Kadar kelajuan perubahan seseorang itu taksama, you can’t expect people to have the same success rate just because you have it that way.

2. The fact that there are people around you, who cares for you, despite you not seeing them – is just a huge blessing in disguise.